the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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