Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
