Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
