Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
