I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
My ATM looks so different sober.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
