this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Randomize
