Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
