Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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