Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
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