Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The feeling are messing with the penis
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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