I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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