So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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