I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
