I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
