I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
My vagina is officially offended.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize