Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize