non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
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