I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
