North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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