CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
