I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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