It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
