i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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