Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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