I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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