You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
