But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
