She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
