shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
