Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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