Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
