Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
