Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
