you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
