don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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