what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
