Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
