Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
