Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
