i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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