Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
