Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
