i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
