I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
