Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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