i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
