Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Having a random hookup so left but love u
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
