So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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