How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
