new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
