O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
